Sunday, January 8, 2012

Sometimes Facebook can be good for you

There's a girl my age who used to be in my parents' ward (she has since gotten married and moved) who posted a link on Facebook to watch a hilarious music video spoof of 'California Gurls' by Katy Perry. DivineComedy at BYU (basically a comedy team/group that performs some pretty funny skits, mostly teasing Provo culture) made a video called 'Provo, UT Gurls'. It's pretty good if you understand the jokes. So that video provided some entertainment, but somehow I saw a different link leading me to another video that was of a little more serious nature than the Katy Perry spoof. It's called 'The Law of Chastity is Not a Crash Diet'. It starts off being really cute (watching and seeing what the kids choose to do) and in the end there's a touching message. Then, after reading the comments, I was led to a link which took me to what inspired me to make this blog post.

Pres. Dieter F. Uchtdorf's April 2010 General Conference Talk entitled Continue In Patience.

The reason why this talk meant so much to me is because just this morning I was being sort of a drama queen. As Josh puts it, I "woke up on the wrong side of the bed." I dunno, maybe it's a girl thing, or maybe it's just me, but I tend to get upset over little things, and when big things happen I'm relatively calm about it (unless there's potential danger to me or my loved ones). Anyways, this morning's "drama" was me getting mad at Josh because today was our last day of break before school begins again on Monday and I knew he was scheduled to work at 2pm, so I wanted to hike yesterday as he would be off work. Thus, we could take our time hiking and what not. So I woke up this morning pissed that we did not go hiking yesterday. I know, I know. Stupid. But luckily I have a very level-headed and loving husband who talked it out with me and brought me to my senses. I got ready and after we got into the car I was still feeling slightly upset so I decided to say a prayer. I started crying because I realized how silly, selfish, and prideful I had been. Not trying to be self-destructive, just stating the obvious. So I prayed for strength to overcome these weaknesses for Josh. He deserves for me to better myself so that I may bless him. I don't want to be a burden, even in trivial situations such as this one. After that I was calm and cheered up. Prayers work wonders.

This talk was basically an answer to my prayers. I honestly want to work hard at bettering myself so that I may better my relationship and, in turn, better the part of Josh's life that I directly affect by my actions. I'm so grateful that Heavenly Father loves us enough to inspire these righteous men to represent Him and to send His messages of love and guidance through out the world. I know that they are true witnesses of the Lord.

It's amazing how much peace one can feel after resolving a struggle, and seeing that there really is hope in many other wonderful things to look forward to.

Thursday, January 5, 2012

New Year, New Thoughts

We have been on Christmas/Winter break from school for almost 3 weeks now and it has been completely amazing. Since I quit the USS MO I've been pretending that I'm unemployed (when really I'm only taking a break from the Dept. of Parks and Rec. job). Pretty much, I've mentally checked out these 3 weeks and it's been wonderful! Josh and I have been surfing a lot (that's a given), hanging out with our friend Robert, who came home from BYU-Provo for the holidays, and Josh's other buddies from Hawaii Kai. So we've slept over his parents house a lot in Niu Valley. We just use his old room. His family is so nice about it, they're the best in-laws I could ask for! Really, they take such good care of us. We also went to my family's annual holiday camp at Bellows from Dec. 28-31. That was really fun. Other than that, we started watching some new shows in addition to our 'Office' infatuation. I remembered a show I saw when I was a freshman in college called Lie to Me. We're in Season 2 now. And we also started Burn Notice! Gahhhh I freakin love Netflix.

Yesterday was such a wonderful day because Josh was actually off of work on a Wednesday, which pretty much never happens. I had planned for us to do a sunrise hike at the Pillboxes in Kailua (bunkers), but we ended up sleeping in until 9 am (which NEVER happens!!). I made Josh an omelette breakfast while he washed our Buick and Jake and Wendy's car. He was in a good mood so I was in a good mood too! Mom, Amalie, and Shy came over to help Shy make stuff for her son Fenix's birthday party on Saturday. After that was pau, we ate lunch and packed the car to go surfing. We then came home around 5 and got ready to go out for dinner! We ate at CPK in Waikiki, then went to Ward to watch Sherlock Holmes (which was pretty good!). Mind you, we did this all fo' freeeeee!!! My favorite kind of date. Mom & Pops Graham gave us a gift card for CPK for Christmas, and Isaac & Shy gave us the Consolidated Theatres gift card. Thanks guys!!! Again, yesterday was so wonderful because it was a full day of Ari and Josh.

Yesterday Josh asked me an interesting question: "How did we work out? It doesn't make any sense." Assuming anybody reading this blog knows me and how my life has been, they might agree. I told Josh that I didn't know, but I'm just so grateful that we did work out. Marriage has been hard but it's been so amazing at the same time! Hard only because it is a new experience and takes some adjusting. Today I realized something. For my whole life I've struggled with self-confidence/esteem issues. Even being married, knowing someone loves me despite seeing all my faults and weaknesses, I can still get pretty down on myself once in awhile (which I know is very unhealthy, but I'm working on it). When I think of myself, independent of anyone else, I don't feel content. I always feel like I'm doing something wrong, or I could be doing something better, or I could improve myself in some way. But when I think of me and Josh as a unit, I feel so...content. And happy. And complete. Sure, I'm still a "naive newlywed" of 7-ish months, but I've learned a lot in these 7 months. Right from the start, the learning began. I'm so happy in the situation I am, and so grateful, that sometimes when I think about all of it and how happy I am and how lucky and blessed I am to even be in this situation...although it may not always be perfect, like my husband said, it works. And that's all that matters to me.

So those are just my thoughts. I'm so excited for this new year! Happy New Year :)