Today started like any other normal day. Just imagine your usual routine of running around to get ready to go to your full time job. All day at work was hectic as it usually is moving from one lesson to another and to another, all while trying to herd cats (aka nearly 30 students). Right when the bell rang I rushed around my classroom to prep for tomorrow's lessons then ran out the door to drive all over tarnation running errands.
On one errand I had to stop at my mom's house and as I was trying to run back out the door 5 seconds after running IN through the door, she stopped me and said, "Can you do me a favor? Can you go to grampa's grave and put flowers there?" For a second I thought it was his birthday but then she said, "Today marks 5 years since he passed away."
It added yet another errand to my already growing list but this was something I willingly did. I made it my last stop on my way home. I don't even know how long it's been since I've visited my grandparents graves but somehow, my intuition guided me right to their graves in the middle of a gigantic field of graves. It was such a nice, serene way to end a day full of chaos and hustling and bustling.
It gave me some great perspective. I am a worry wart. There are sooo many things I worry about from the big to the little things. But my grandparents have passed from this busy life and are now resting from their labors of this earth. I know I will join them someday and it made me realize, "Why does it matter so much if only 70% of my students are attaining proficiency in Reading or Math? Why does it matter if my lessons were not perfect today? I am doing the best I can with the resources and the time that I have. I mess up a lot but I don't give up on trying to be great. I think I'm making my grandparents proud.
5 years ago I was so excited and engaged to be married when my Grampa passed away 6 days before my birthday. It put a damper on things but I felt his presence in the sealing room when I was married in the temple 3 months later. Families are forever.
I love you Grampa. Thanks for being such a great example to me. Happy 5 years.